“Do You Love Me More Than These?”

When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, 

“Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, 

“Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Feed my lambs.”

— John 21:15 —

The question Jesus asks Peter has everything to do with priorities. Peter, Andrew, James and John worked as fishermen. The statement Peter makes here is more of a declaration that he was going back to what he knew before he met Jesus three years before.

Jesus is asking us the same question: Do we love Him more than these? We’re not talking about fish, but rather, self, money and family.

Paul warned Timothy, “But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self” (2 Tim. 3:1–2). Do we seriously believe we’re the first people ever to be so consumed with self? It’s expressed in different ways — selfies, “Have it your way!”, “I’ve gotta have my music!” TV commercials overwhelm us with the idea that we’re the center of the universe; that we’re the standard; that what we think and do is the most important thing. Social media (Facebook, Twitter) urges us to tell the entire world what we think because what we think should matter to everyone, right?

Paul spoke of the promotion of self-made worship (Col. 2:23). Again, we’re in the twenty-first century thinking first-century thoughts! We’re doing what mankind has almost always done: putting self first. Remember, Paul spoke of difficult days where the first thing listed was the love of self. How dangerous self-love is.

When we’re consumed by self, God’s desires don’t really matter so much to us — they might coincide, or they might not. But when we think we matter more than anything, then we’ll ignore what God’s word teaches (Titus 2:11–15). And so we worship the way we want, buying into one of the biggest lies Satan’s ever told us: that it doesn’t matter to God how we worship as long we’re going to the church of our choice!

Jesus said, “But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth” (John 4:23–24). “Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life” (John 12:25).

Paul put it this way: “Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect” (Rom. 12:1–2). Self is the worst standard when it comes to worshipping our Creator — “because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen” (Rom. 1:25).

Right alongside the misplaced priority of self is the love of money (2 Tim. 3:2). Being moved by the Holy Spirit of God, the apostle Paul wrote, “But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs” (1 Tim. 6:6–10). Later in the same context he then added: “As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life” (1 Tim. 6:17–19). As Solomon put it: “Better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble with it” (Prov. 15:16).

Jesus said, “No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money” (Matt. 6:24; also read Luke 12:13–21). So why do we try? Do we believe we’re the exception to the rule?

Finally, we can be guilty of putting our families above God: “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:26). Jesus didn’t say it would be difficult to be his disciple by putting self and family first, he said we cannot do it.

Do we love Jesus more than these?

For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome (1 John 5:3). 

If you love me, you will keep my commandments (John 14:15).

Speaking the Truth in Love

Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in 

every way into him who is the head, into Christ

—Ephesians 4:15—

He who speaks truth declares righteousness, 

but a false witness, deceit.

—Proverbs 12:17—

Not everyone who had the face-to-face opportunity to speak to Jesus while he was on earth used it well. Quite frankly it seems that hardly anyone did. But when the rich young ruler came to Jesus, he asked him an extremely important question: “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?”

What I find most interesting is that what the Lord says in quick response was an essential snapshot of Mosaic Law. “You know the commandments: ‘Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and mother.’” The excitement in this man’s reply to Jesus is unmistakable: “Teacher, all these I have kept from my youth.” And with a cursory glance into the text we might think the conversation between Jesus and this man was done. But it wasn’t.

The full story of the rich young ruler and Jesus is found in Matthew (19:16–22), Mark (10:17–22) and Luke (18:18–23). One of the most significant details of this story, however, is only found in Mark. We find there: “And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, “You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me” (Mark 10:21).

Jesus loved this man. Some suggest that Jesus felt love for him because of his charm, but there’s nothing in the text of any one of the gospel accounts that would manifest this. It might be—and this just as speculative as anyone else’s guess—that Jesus’ love toward him was because of what he was about to tell him, knowing (possibly) the outcome. We don’t know, but what we do know—again—is that Jesus loved this man and told him the difficult truth that he needed.

The apostle Paul warned Timothy: “I charge you in the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who is to judge the living and the dead, and by his appearing and his kingdom: preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths” (2 Tim. 4:1–4).

Earlier in this second letter to Timothy, the apostle foretold “that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God” (2 Tim. 3:1–4).

We might believe that Paul was exclusively referring to our day and time. Alas, what he wrote could serve as divine commentary to practically all of mankind’s history. We too often give lip-service to truth, much like those in Jesus’ day (Mark 7:1–13), but we don’t want anyone to judge us on what we do (see Matt. 7:24–27). We offer platitudes while forging ahead living the way we want (Psalm 78:34–39).

We desperately need to love the truth (Psalm 119:160; Prov. 23:23; John 8:31–32; 17:17), and love those who are willing to tell us the truth (Prov. 12:17–22; 14:5, 25; Heb. 13:17–18). Paul insisted that he and the others who taught the truth had “renounced disgraceful, underhanded ways. We refuse to practice cunning or to tamper with God’s word, but by the open statement of the truth we would commend ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God” (2 Cor. 4:2).

There are very many who do not love the truth (2 Thess. 2:9–12). They have itching ears, accumulating teachers that entertain them. “And many will follow their sensuality, and because of them the way of truth will be blasphemed. And in their greed they will exploit you with false words. Their condemnation from long ago is not idle . . . These are waterless springs and mists driven by a storm. For them the gloom of utter darkness has been reserved. For . . . they entice by sensual passions of the flesh those who are barely escaping from those who live in error. They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption” (2 Pet. 2:2–3, 17–19).

Jesus loved the rich young ruler, and spoke the truth in love. “Disheartened by the saying, [the ruler] went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions” (Mark 10:22). Jesus didn’t run after him begging him or coercing him into obedience. The truth from Jesus’ mouth accomplished what he purposed, and succeeded in the thing for which he sent it (Isa. 55:11).

Consumer Christianity

Our culture is all about the consumer. We hear and believe things like—“The consumer is always right.” And the real problem comes into focus when we find people applying the consumer mindset to God, His church, and salvation. For example, the notion that one church is as good as another, or that we’re all heading to heaven in different ways. The expression, “Go to the church of your choice” seems to summarize the religious person’s consumer mindset.

One writer put it this way—“Every church has the problem of Consumer Christians: people who attend, sing, listen, drop in some money, and go home.” The point is simple enough: Consumer Christians lack a genuine connection to the Lord (they don’t understand the relationship He seeks with us) and even the relationships they are supposed to be a part of with other disciples: “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near” (Hebrews 10:24–25). Or, “Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor” (Romans 12:10).

These Consumer Christians among us have essentially left their first love (Revelation 2:4) if they ever had that love in the first place. And once they are dissatisfied—whether they find themselves disappointed in people or in God—they go shopping somewhere else to find what they’re looking for. “Self-made religion” is what the apostle Paul called it (Colossians 2:23). It existed in his day, and continues in ours.

When Paul wrote Timothy, he gave him the solemn charge to “preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths” (2 Timothy 4:2–4).

With a consumer mindset, people look to God and the congregation of believers they are part of in a number of misdirected and dangerous ways.

Some will look to God as a harsh taskmaster that they really don’t want anything to do with; that He’s aloof and detached from real problems. He’s there, but He’s not attentive. They will look to the congregation as something they’re not a part of, speaking in terms of “What they do …” rather than, “What we’re doing.” The Consumer Christian doesn’t simply have high expectations, they have unrealistic and often subjective expectations they hold to firmly in their unfair condemnation of others without first considering themselves; that these high expectations (and rules) don’t apply to them, but do apply to everyone else.

We’re all going to fail one another at one time or another. We’re all going to disappoint one another, but when we eagerly show compassion and love to one another, we won’t hold it against anyone that they’ve failed us because we realize that we, too, fail others. “Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart … Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 1:22; 4:8).

Rather than being a Consumer Christian, we need to strive to be a Servant just like our Lord and Savior—“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). When we serve one another from a genuine heart of love we will “grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love” (Ephesians 4:15–16).

Instead of us asking what others could do for us, we need to ask what we could do to help others. “Well done, good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:21). “In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven” (Matthew 5:16).

“Not that we dare to classify or compare ourselves with some of those who are commending themselves. But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding. … For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends” (2 Corinthians 10:12, 18).

Don’t be a Consumer Christian.