Pride Month

Rainbow tinted profile pictures, rainbow light displays, the pride flag on nearly every staff—reminders about what month we’re in greet us at every turn. Pride Month has grown from a recessed community recognition to an international celebration. 

We can no longer ignore what’s going on “out there” in the world, because now the world is barging into the community of believers, demanding full acceptance (or else). Followers of Jesus must reckon with the LGBTQIA+ community — the agendas and the people. Especially the people. But we need to remind ourselves of what the apostle Peter wrote to the first century Christians who lived in a world generally annoyed and angered by them:

Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect (1 Pet 3:14-15).

Sometimes what we feel about this celebration of sin looks like “righteous indignation” and maybe zeal. But as truth takes hit after hit after hit, we need to draw some hard lines in the proverbial sand, stand up for what’s righteous, and speak for the truth. Yet, in a society fueled by outrage about nearly everything, I want to propose that while indignation may have its place, our first response should very likely be a broken (and therefore compassionate) heart.

Remembering My Sinfulness

Allow me to ask: What’s the worst sin in the Bible? 

There’s only one sin that Jesus said was unpardonable, unforgivable — the sin of blasphemy against the Holy Spirit (Matt 12:22-32). This is the section just before Jesus’ statement about us being judged for every idle word we may say (vv. 33-37).

Outside of this sin of blasphemy against the Holy Spirit I would believe it right to say that any sin will destroy our perfect relationship with God, separating (even eternally) from God. 

And He was saying, “That which proceeds out of the man, that is what defiles the man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders, adulteries, deeds of coveting and wickedness, as well as deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride and foolishness. All these evil things proceed from within and defile the man.” (Mark 7:20-23)

Daniel serves well as a cautionary story — he was captured as a teen, and he lived almost his entire earthly life in Babylon; nearly 70 years in captivity. One day while he was reading and thinking about the prophecies of Jeremiah, he realized that the time of exile was nearly done. He knew why his people had been punished by Babylon in the first place, and in his prayer, he said: “Compassion and forgiveness belong to the Lord our God, though we have rebelled against him and have not obeyed the LORD our God by following his instructions that he set before us through his servants the prophets.” (Dan 9:9-10)

We might wonder what sin Daniel was guilty of because there’s nothing in the biblical record that tells us, but he, like all of us, certainly was a sinner (Rom 3:10, 23; Gal 3:22). My point is that in his prayer he includes himself by saying “we” and “us.”

If we have any integrity, Pride Month could probably be called “Self-Righteousness” month for us all. Like the Pharisee in Jesus’ parable (Lk 18:9-14), we are prone to thank God that we’re not like “them,” as if we’re a better class of sinner.

This month we all need to remember that every sin, including self-righteousness, is only forgiven by the blood of Jesus Christ, the Son of the living God and our mediator (John 14:6; Rom 6:1-7; Gal 3:26-29, 1 Tim 2:5). As Isaiah reminds us all: “But we are all like an unclean thing, and all our righteousness is like filthy rags; we all fade as a leaf, and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.” (Isaiah 64:6)

It might seem easy to condemn others this month, but if we’re looking in the mirror of God’s word (James 1:19-25), then we will see our own hideousness. We all need to see the ugliness of our own sins and busy ourselves working on ourselves (Philippians 2:12-13).

We All Need Jesus' Compassion

The one big thing it seems the Pharisees lacked was compassion. In Mark 3:1-6 we have an example of just how hard-hearted they were against others who were not them. In this case, there was a man with a withered hand: 

Then He said to them, “Is it lawful on the Sabbath to do good or to do evil, to save life or to kill?” But they kept silent. And when He had looked around at them with anger, being grieved by the hardness of their hearts, He said to the man, “Stretch out your hand.” And he stretched it out, and his hand was restored as whole as the other. (vv. 4-5)

In Luke 18:9-14 Jesus tells them a parable — and we’re informed by the Holy Spirit that “He spoke this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others.” (v. 9) He could well be telling that parable to us all.

I often think of Jesus walking among us, among mankind. I realize we may feel that things in the 21st century are much worse than they were in the 1st, but we’d be wrong with that assessment. Mankind is chock full of sinners (Rom 3:23). Our sins today are like all the sins of yesterday. And they are despicable.

And yet Jesus didn’t walk around sneering at people and mocking them. That’s essentially what the Pharisees seemed to do:

But all their works they do to be seen by men. They make their phylacteries broad and enlarge the borders of their garments. They love the best places at feasts, the best seats in the synagogues . . . But he who is greatest among you shall be your servant. And whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted. . . . But woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you shut up the kingdom of heaven against men; for you neither go in yourselves, nor do you allow those who are entering to go in. (Matt 23:5-6, 11-13)

Do we weep over our own sins? We may feel justified being angry about the sins of others — again, it being Pride Month — but are we moved to tears?

Sin destroys lives — think about the first sin of Adam against all of mankind (Gen 3; Rom 5). “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Rom 6:23)

We should be moved to pray for others — “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.” (Matt 5:43-45)

We also need to pray to God to help us when we’re talking to others. “Speaking the truth in love” (Eph 4:15). “Love is always patient; love is always kind; love is never envious or arrogant with pride” (1 Cor 13:4).

Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. (Col 4:5-6)

Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world (Phil 2:14-15)

In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. (Matt 5:16)

We are not judges, we are sinners — “For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.” (Rom 5:6)

What Do We Lack?

And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, “You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” Disheartened by the saying, he went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions. (Mark 10:21–22)

The story of the rich young ruler astounds me nearly every time that I hear it or read it because this man doesn’t seem far off from the mindset of God. Quite honestly, in my own estimation of things, this man is better than me because I’m confident the Lord would say I lack more than “one thing.”

One thing.

This man had been keeping the commands of God from his youth (Mark 10:20). And Jesus does not argue with him, doesn’t hastily correct him, on this. Jesus doesn’t say, “That’s what you think!”

His going away grieving is amazing, too, isn’t it? He’s been told that he lacks one thing, but he goes away grieving. This “one thing” was big. Obviously it was big enough to keep him from following Jesus. He went away … 

If we examine ourselves as we should (2 Cor 13:5), what would we come away with? Maybe we fear self-examination, and so we don’t do it — we hope to ignore our sins long enough that they will go away on their own, or maybe even improve without us having to deal with them at all.

Or maybe we succeed in being dishonest with ourselves, and our self-examination never leads to correction. We believe we’re all right as we are, that there’s no room for improvement. This is delusional (James 1:22, 26;  1 Cor 3:18; 6:9;  Gal 6:3, 7;  2 Tim 3:12–13;  1 John 1:8).

In Greek mythology we meet a man who seems invincible. His name is Achilles. The myth is that he was dipped into the river Styx by his mother. He was immersed, except for where she was holding him: his heel. And so today, we talk about a weakness as someone’s Achilles heel.

Everyone doesn’t suffer from the same weaknesses. Some struggle with alcoholism, while others don’t ever find themselves tempted to take one drink. Some are consumed by sex, money or power. Paul urged the Corinthians, “Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall” (1 Cor 10:12).

“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18). As an illustration of this, we will consider Matthew 26:30–35:

And when they had sung a hymn, they went out to the Mount of Olives. Then Jesus said to them, “You will all fall away because of me this night. For it is written, ‘I will strike the shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered.’ But after I am raised up, I will go before you to Galilee.” Peter answered him, “Though they all fall away because of you, I will never fall away.” Jesus said to him, “Truly, I tell you, this very night, before the rooster crows, you will deny me three times.” Peter said to him, “Even if I must die with you, I will not deny you!” And all the disciples said the same.

We remember how tragically this ended for Peter. Thankfully, he was not consumed by self-destruction, nor his desire to repent and make things right with the Lord (see John 21:15–19). I’d suggest that in this story we find Peter’s “Achilles heel” to be over-confidence (pride) in himself.
The point of all this is for us to honestly examine ourselves in light of God’s will. If we lack knowledge of his word, then we need to step up on that immediately and prayerfully (2 Tim 2:15; 3:14—4:5;  James 1:5–8;  2 Pet 1:5–11).

It’s not just that “we know better,” but that we “do better.” James urges us to be doers of the word (James 1:22). But it’s not just about being busy, but being active in a growing faith for the edification of ourselves and our spiritual family (Eph 4:11–16;  Heb 10:24–25).

We need also to remind ourselves that we cannot serve God and mammon (Matt 6:24; also see James 4:4). Mammon could very well be wealth or money, as more recent English translations have it. But some have suggested the word mammon means anything that could serve as an idol and replace God. God wants us to serve him completely (Matt 22:34–40;  Rom 8:5–11;  Col 3:1–11).

What do we lack? Are we willing to see the spiritual obstacles for what they are, or will we continue to ignore them? Judgment is coming for us all (Heb 9:27). We can be ready on God’s terms by knowing his will, and doing it (Php 2:12–13).

For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil (2 Cor 5:10).

Caring Enough to Confront (Matthew 18:15-17)

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector” (Matthew 18:15–17).

The hardest commands are more likely the ones we understand completely but really struggle in accomplishing. I believe that what Jesus says here in this passage is one of those difficult commands because it’s a lot easier to talk about someone than to talk to someone, especially when we feel that we’ve been wronged.

I’ve learned the hard way that talking to someone is, in the long run, the better thing to do … always. There’s never a wrong time to do the right thing.

Many of the problems we endure are self-made: whether we think someone said something negatively about us, or we think they don’t like us — a lot of times these issues are in our own minds. Maybe we misunderstood what someone said, or we took umbrage because of a perceived tone in what they said: “I don’t like the way he said that to me!” Sometimes our immaturity manifests itself in these things.

Again, and always, there’s never a wrong time to do the right thing. And the converse is equally true: There’s never a right time to do the wrong thing.

The key sometimes to walking “in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love” (Eph. 4:1–2) is doing what the Lord commanded in Matthew 18:15 — “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone.”

By the way, what Jesus said here not a divine suggestion: it is the Lord’s command with how we’re to work together. The point is in gaining one’s brother!

I’m not sure exactly what’s at the heart of our not wanting to talk to one another: maybe it’s pride (where we want to hang onto things to the point we feel justified in our bitterness), or maybe it’s simple foolishness (we just don’t know any better, and don’t want to know or do any better) . We might actually defend ourselves by saying that we don’t want to get hurt; well, apparently, we’re already hurting: and misery loves company. Maybe it’s cowardice (Rev. 21:8).

Again, in my experience, after all is said and done, peace comes by confronting ones fears and talking to someone: the ideal situation would be to do a face-to-face, but sometimes calling and talking will work — it’s a lot more effective than texting or emailing because so much is missed or even read between the lines; when we are able to hear how someone is explaining themselves or talking to us, it leaves a lot less room for dangerous ideas.

In Luke 17:3–4, Jesus said: “Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him” (Luke 17:3–4).

Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. … Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you (Eph. 4:25–27, 29–32).

In nearly every relationship we have in life under the sun, we’re going to find those moments where we test one another. We should realize that it’s not just that we have to be patient with others, but that others are being patient with us. As the apostle Peter put it: “Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing” (1 Pet. 3:8–9).

God is calling us to love — “We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19). “In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. … Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him” (1 John 3:10, 15).

If we truly love our brethren, when they sin against (or we feel they have) then we will be honest enough and kind enough to confront them privately — Jesus said it, that settles it.